We moved to my hometown, settled in, and then my focus shifted to taking care of my sweet little baby girl, Riley. I completely embraced being a stay-at-home mom. I joined MOMS Club and became president my local chapter. I organized play dates and attended library story times. Then we had baby girl number two, Peyton, and moved again. I joined another chapter of MOMS Club, made lots of new friends, created websites for clubs, read and discussed books with book clubs, and watched my babies grow into school aged children. Then I became room mom, weekly school volunteer, girl scout leader, and yearbook coordinator. My husband worked a lot, and we enjoyed a busy life full of friends, play and school. The majority of my life was my kids and anything that had to do with them.
During the summer before my youngest went into first grade, I was able to squeeze in a few classes and a couple of national tests so that I could earn my Ohio Teaching License. Once my kids were both in school full day, I started to substitute teach. At first, it was a very tough transition. Even though I was subbing at my own kids' school with teachers that I knew and really liked, I didn't sleep at all the night before my first day. I had to send my kids to my friend's house who would put them on the bus. I felt like I was abandoning them. In reality, they were fine. The more I subbed, the easier it became. I even took a long term substitute teaching position in Kindergarten at my children's school. It was a whirlwind six weeks at the end of the school year filled with tons of new learning on my part and squeezing in my children's own busy after school activities and recitals.
Then summer break came and we decided to move locally. When school started back up in the fall, I focused on getting the old house ready to sell and then fixing up the house we bought that needed tons of work. I painted every wall and supervised various house improvement projects like new windows, new garage door, and new air conditioner. One day when I went to volunteer in Riley's classroom, I was asked to substitute as a paraprofessional for about eight weeks at the end of the school year. I gladly accepted as I was ready to get back into the classroom with students.
When the next school year rolled around, I still had a lot of work to do on the house, so I just decided to continue substitute teaching. I walked with one friend in the morning and another friend in the afternoon before the kids came home. In between I would take care of household responsibilities and continued work on the house. I subbed occasionally, but was enjoying the balance between substitute teaching and being a stay-at-home mom. My dad was also very sick at this time, so I was going back and forth between Indianapolis to help out and visit. My dad passed away on December 2, 2012 and two days later I received a call to interview for a long term substitute teaching position that had the potential to turn into a permanent teaching position. It may seem strange, but the timing to me seemed pretty perfect. Although I was very sad that my dad was gone, I knew mom wouldn't need me to come and help out as much anymore. I was hired to take the position at the interview and started just a few days later. I grew to love that class and the teachers on the team I was lucky enough to join. My workaholic tendencies took over and I spent a lot of time and energy planning and teaching that fourth grade class. My husband wasn't thrilled at the shift in my focus, but he understood. Our family made it through to the end of the school year, and we all learned a lot. I was even hired for a full time teaching position in the fall.
I tried to divide the summer into equal time periods - work on the house (which will never be done), do fun activities with the kids, and prepare for a great school year with my new fourth graders. In the end, I worked on all three areas but there didn't seem to be enough time to do enough of any of them. The house still needed work, there were a lot of activities on our list of fun things to do as a family that we never got to, and there was still a huge stack of professional books and children's books that I didn't get a chance to read.
We all jumped head first into a new school year, feeling somewhat prepared, but not completely. Riley was starting middle school, and Peyton was starting fourth grade at a different school than mine. We made it through, day by day. Some days were easier than others. The theme of never having enough time for everything continued. We learned to work hard, do our best and enjoy everything along the way.
Over the past few months, a few teaching friends have told me not to stress out or worry. Keep family first, work hard and it will all work out. I think I started to breathe a little easier when I realized that I wasn't alone. Of course, I knew that all along. In fact, I knew I was lucky that I had ten years that I could focus the majority of my time on just my family. Many other people don't get that opportunity. Now I was joining the normal people who had already figured out how to balance a job and having a family. I know I was pretty wimpy to have such a hard time, but teaching isn't just 8:20-3:55 nine months a year. Teachers work at night and on weekends planning. I worry about my students and the effectiveness of my teaching when I get ready in the morning or when I am trying to sleep. Balancing it all is like juggling. I try to keep all the balls - the kids' evening schedules, grading papers, lesson plans, curriculum changes, coursework to maintain my license, family activities, housework, braces for Peyton, homework, birthdays, girl scout meetings, Sunday School lessons, and everything else up in the air. Sometimes a ball falls and that can be embarrassing and disappointing. Now, we just throw it back up in the air and smile. I've done a lot of laughing lately, and it hasn't been only because something was funny. I laughed uncontrollably when my sliding van door wouldn't shut and I had to pick up a kid in 10 minutes and then drive 10 miles to drop off the van while the van door was wide open. I had a million things to do that night, but I've come to understand that plans change and you just have to laugh and find the bright side.
Even today when I have a lot of work to do for two classes I'm taking for my license renewal, I have a stack of writing assignments to grade, and I need to work on report cards, lesson plans and some fun Read Across American ideas, I will find time to laugh with my kids, tell Peyton how cute she looks in her new glasses, and maybe go to dinner with my husband while the kids are at sleepovers. It's certainly a different life than I had a few years ago, but I wouldn't go back for anything. I love the students, teachers, and the new learning I am continually doing. It's a challenge, but a rewarding one!